According to a 2020 study by Kajabi, 84% of entrepreneurs and business owners experience Imposter Syndrome. It seems as if there are lots of successful people out there feeling undeserving of it AND suffering in silence.
The best way to combat the darkness is to bring it into the light. So today, we are digging into Imposter Syndrome. What it is, who’s at risk, what’s at risk and 3 things you can do about it so that Imposter Syndrome doesn’t wreck your productivity or influence your marketing decisions.
RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
The Power of Vulnerability
What’s Imposter Syndrome?
[Theresa] Imposter Syndrome is defined as the feelings of self-doubt and personal incompetence that persist despite your education, experience, and accomplishments.
In the simplest of terms, Imposter Syndrome is feeling like a fraud.
[Meghan] To be clear, we’re not talking about BEING an actual fraud. We are talking about a false belief that you don’t deserve the success you have or irrational fear that people will find out that you don’t have certain knowledge or abilities despite evidence to the contrary.
[Theresa] The term, which was originally called Imposter Phenomenon, was originated by psychologists Suzanna Imes and Pauline Rose Clance in the 1970s. Originally it was thought to plague high-achieving women, but we now know that’s no longer the case.
[Meghan] As we mentioned in the introduction, 84% of entrepreneurs and business owners experience Imposter Syndrome. But that’s not the only staggering statistic found by that Kajabi study.
It also found that
- A good portion of business owners feel that their success is due to luck
- Small business owners tend to compare themselves to—and feel less intelligent than—those around them
- Over 20% of entrepreneurs are often worried about being “found out” for lack of knowledge or ability
- Most entrepreneurs and small business owners tend to discount the importance of their work
- Men are over 30% more likely to experience Imposter Syndrome than women
[Theresa] Crazy, right? Everyone is fair game when it comes to impostorism. It matters not how long you’ve been in business, if you have a business, how much success you’ve had, how many failures you’ve experienced, your gender, your race, or your religion.
Imposter Syndrome can happen to anyone. So, if you’ve struggled with it, know that you’re not alone.
We are right there with you. In a bit, I’ll share a recent story of my own Imposter Syndrome struggle and what I did about it.
But first, let’s talk about the risks that can manifest by not identifying Imposter Syndrome and dealing with it.
Imposter Syndrome Signs and Risks
[Meghan] Good idea. First, to fully understand the risks of impostorism, let’s identify the symptoms.
Some of the common signs of Imposter Syndrome include: (Source: Very Well Minded)
- Self-doubt
- An inability to realistically assess your competence and skills
- Attributing your success to external factors
- Berating your performance
- Fear that you won’t live up to expectations
- Overachieving
- Sabotaging your own success
- Setting very challenging goals and feeling disappointed when you fall short
[Theresa] With a list like that, it’s not surprising there are many consequences of feeling this way. Left unchecked, impostorism can
- Reinforce limiting beliefs (for example, if you believe you won’t live up to expectations, you won’t)
- Make you work harder instead of smarter (for example, hustling to do more even if it’s not important work just to quiet your own self-doubt)
- Cause you miss out on good opportunities (for example, the fearfulness of “being found out” will have you saying no when you should be saying yes)
- Permit you to feel unworthy of your successes (for example, you don’t celebrate closing that new client because you believe it was just luck)
- Diminish your productivity (for example, you waste time and energy on things that don’t matter trying to prove something to yourself or you procrastinate)
- Cause unmanageable anxiety (for example, allowing these feelings to overwhelm you can cause needless apprehension and foreboding)
[Meghan] Wow, those are some serious consequences! They can most certainly creep in and mess with your marketing as well as your productivity.
But, here’s the good news! The awareness of Imposter Syndrome and how it manifests itself in your life is the first step to defeating it when it occurs. And it WILL occur.
Don’t ignore it by pretending it’s not happening. Face it head-on. Dealing with impostorism removes the power it can have over you.
Imposter Syndrome at Work
[Theresa]That’s right. Very recently, I had a serious grapple with Imposter Syndrome. Here’s what happened.
I was coming off a group coaching session for my Plan To Achieve program. I turned the camera off and stayed for a while to chat with one of my students, who is also one of my networking colleagues.
During our conversation, she shared that she was thinking of investing in another networking colleague’s group coaching program and asked for my advice. I felt the first pang.
You see, this other coach is a really big deal, and I immediately felt inadequate. While I tried so hard to focus on the conversation I was having, these thoughts flooded through my mind:
- I suck.
- I can’t help anyone.
- No one needs my knowledge and skills.
- Who do I think I am?
- I can’t compete.
- Everyone will know that I have no idea what I’m talking about.
- I’m a total fraud.
- I should just give up.
- Why bother?
I barely managed to finish my conversation before I was on Google researching this other amazing coach. I thought, “Oh my gosh, this is way worse than I imagined! No one from my networking organization is going to send me a referral ever again.”
[Meghan] Oh no…it’s like you can see the cliff and that you’re driving right towards it, but you can’t seem to stop yourself!
[Theresa] Exactly. Despite knowing that no good would come of it, I continued to dig and read. The more I read, the worse it got until this was the soundtrack playing over and over in my head:
“You’ve just wasted the time and energy of all of your Plan To Achieve students. You can’t help them at all. You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
I felt horrible guilt and sadness. With that, I quietly closed my laptop and went to bed. I slept horribly.
By 4 AM I gave up and got up determined to start my day with a better attitude. But it was futile. You see, that soundtrack was still playing in my head, but now with this new addition, “You’re a horrible person, Theresa.”
By 5 AM I was fully in shame.
In the audiobook The Power of Vulnerability, Brene Brown explains the difference between guilt and shame. Guilt says, “I’ve done something bad.” Shame says, “I am bad.”
I definitely felt like a bad person. Yeah. I was bad.
So, I struggled through my morning playing tug of war with the contrast between my negative self-talk and the evidence that the self-talk was untrue. The evidence being the real-time results and feedback from my students.
We’ll come back to that in a bit, but what I realized that morning was that I was experiencing extreme Imposter Syndrome.
What Causes Imposter Syndrome?
[Meghan] Imposter Syndrome is really no joke. While Theresa experienced sleeplessness, anxiety, guilt, and shame, that’s not what caused it to happen in the first place.
Nor did the conversation she had with her student or the success of a competitor. There were other factors at work.
1) Perfectionism
[Theresa] Absolutely. The first factor that contributed to my Imposter Syndrome was perfectionism. My inner perfectionist made an appearance. The constant desire to be further along than I am and have more sophisticated systems in place than I do is at constant war with the realist in me that says what I’m doing is good enough for now.
In other words, I want it all to be perfect right now. Because deep down perfect equals professional.
[Meghan] Even though Theresa logically knows that her business will never be perfect, impostorism tells her that imperfect means not good enough. That is to say, perfectionism feeds Imposter Syndrome.
2) Comparison
[Theresa] The second factor that contributed to my Imposter Syndrome was comparison. Had I simply finished my conversation and turned off the computer instead of researching the other coach, I could have avoided the whole incident.
[Meghan] By researching the other coach, Theresa found the evidence she sought—that someone was better than her. Not only is that not helpful, it’s also untrue.
Comparing your beginning to someone else’s middle is never a fair comparison. Had Theresa instead compared where she was last year to where she is this year, she’d have found something to celebrate instead of something to criticize.
Theodore Roosevelt wasn’t kidding when he famously said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” Comparing yourself to others in this context is an exercise that’s bound to lead you to a negative attitude and mindset.
3) Stress
[Theresa] The last factor that contributed to my Imposter Syndrome was stress. Normally, I don’t feel a lot of stress. And when I do, I typically manage it well. But lately, I’ve had some personal things going on. Those coupled with my business growth and a few extra commitments have put more stress and strain on me.
I’m not used to that. The added stress has caused me to feel anxious and overwhelmed. It definitely contributed to the Imposter Syndrome.
[Meghan] Anxiety and overwhelm caused by added stress can amplify self-doubt and even cause you to sabotage your own success. The result is that you feel like a phony, even if all the other indications are to the contrary.
Now, we want to point out that perfectionism, comparison, and stress are not the only Imposter Syndrome triggers. You may find that a different set of factors activate impostorism in you.
The next time Imposter Syndrome pops up, ask yourself, “What is going on that might be contributing to my feeling like this?”
Self-discovery helps! There’s no judgment here, only information that can help you conquer the Imposter Syndrome monster then next time it jumps out at you.
What To Do About Imposter Syndrome
[Theresa] Once you’ve identified how Imposter Syndrome shows up for you and what causes it, the next step is to disrupt it. Here are three strategies you can try the next time you’re feeling like a fake.
1) Reframe Your Thoughts
Strategy #1 is to reframe your thoughts.
Negative thoughts and feelings of guilt or shame thrive in secret. Naming the feelings and casting some light on them, in the form of truth, can banish them.
[Meghan] In a previous episode, we shared a simple process to change negative thoughts into positive ones.
Just follow these steps:
- Become aware of the negative thought. Name it.
- Ask yourself if it’s true.
- Identify where that thought came from.
- Reframe the thought.
A strategy like this could be just what you need to remove the power of impostorism.
2) Be Mindful of Your Progress
[Theresa] Strategy #2 is to be mindful of your progress. As we shared earlier, feeling like an imposter can have devastating outcomes. While catching it and reframing your thoughts can help, it may not be enough.
Imposter Syndrome keeps your attention focused on the present. In particular, the feelings you’re having right now and the circumstances that caused the impostorism to emerge.
Taking stock of the progress you HAVE achieved is another useful tactic for defeating Imposter Syndrome.
[Meghan] This is when comparison can be a good thing. By looking back to where you were a year ago and comparing it to where you are now, you’ll be reminded of just how much you’ve grown.
Seeing the progress you’ve made will remind you of all the things you’ve accomplished and get you excited about what’s ahead.
Not only will this enable you to look forward to future progress, but you’ll also recognize that you’re not an imposter at all.
3) Speak With Someone You Trust
[Theresa] Strategy #3 is to speak with someone you trust. Of the tactics we shared today, this is by far the most impactful. And it’s also the one that ultimately moved me past my Imposter Syndrome.
As I mentioned a bit ago, negative thoughts and feelings thrive in secret. By remaining in the dark, they can hold great power over you. Getting those thoughts out in the open brings them into the light where false ideas wither and die.
[Meghan] While this is a mighty tactic, here’s a word of caution. Speaking with the wrong person can backfire. Instead of getting past your feelings of impostorism, it can reaffirm them. So, choose carefully and wisely.
[Theresa] I agree. If you’re wondering who you SHOULD talk to, we shared criteria for that in our episode about quitting. So be sure to check that out.
The “right person” to help me through my Imposter Syndrome was Meghan.
Meghan knows me well—the good, the bad, and the ugly. She also understands my business and what I’m trying to achieve.
But that’s not the only reason I went to her. I knew Meghan would listen, ask the right questions, and share thoughtful insights while showing great empathy and understanding. She helped me dig deeper, so I got to the root cause of my Imposter Syndrome and was able to move on.
[Meghan] Often these emotions make people feel super vulnerable. So, I’m honored that Theresa felt comfortable sharing with me!
Seek out people that can ask you the right critical questions, listen, and honor your privacy. You’re looking for someone who isn’t going to simply compliment you since that doesn’t usually help. In my opinion, talking it out with someone else is the best way to move on and not waste more time on impostorism.
And you do really want to move on! Because as you can probably tell from all of the things we just described, these feelings will kill your productivity and mess with your marketing decisions. You can’t tackle much when you’re feeling like an imposter!
Dealing with Impostorism
[Theresa] Hopefully you have a better understanding of what Imposter Syndrome is, what can trigger it, the risks it poses, and what you can do to overcome it.
[Meghan] If you’ve been experiencing impostorism, please don’t suffer in silence. There’s nothing to feel embarrassed about.
Everyone struggles from time to time. That’s a normal part of life. But not dealing with your thoughts and feelings will only make it worse. Bringing them into the light, getting to the cause of them, and speaking with someone can help you move past it and move on.
[Theresa] That’s a wrap!
Have you ever experienced Imposter Syndrome? Share your story with us in the comments.
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